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Hilarious and On-Point Thanksgiving Message from Bill Maher for his Lefty Friends!
By Bill Maher, Real Time with Bill Maher, November 21, 2025
And finally, new rule. Happy Thanksgiving! I can't believe that even that now is a political issue. It is a real shame what's happened to this holiday, which used to be all about the good F's food, friends, family, football, fun. And now it's fuck you. You're not even invited because you voted for the wrong person. I'm so tired of liberals ghosting half this country. Conservatives do it too, but not nearly as much. Look, whoever's doing it, it's got to stop. Because we're at a point now where politics has broken up more families than letting your wife see your phone.
Now, on the liberal side, there's two camps now. We need to keep talking to people. Wing and the go. No contact wing. That's what they call it. Now go. No contact. This belief that Trump voters, even if it's your own parents, are too deplorable for human contact and must be cut off. You know, like Scientologists do to suppressive people.
A former speechwriter for Obama named David Litt wrote an op ed this year called Is It Time to Stop Snubbing Your Right Wing Family, where he admitted he'd had a change of heart and that was the wrong approach. So, of course, then the woke wing tried to banish him for breaking ranks on their policy of hating people who don't agree with you on everything. Because what fun is life if you're not cutting somebody off? Mr. Litt asked the question, what has all this banishing accomplished? Oh, I know, I know.
A second helping of MAGA. That's what Molly Mcnearney, Jimmy Kimmel's wife and head writer, went public on this topic recently, so I feel it's fair to comment respectfully in public. She says she's lost relationships with relatives because she wrote them an email before the election with ten reasons why they shouldn't vote for Trump, and some still didn't obey. So you know. Ten reasons I could Think of a hundred, but I would never present it to someone as an ultimatum. Ultimatums don't make people rethink their politics. They make them rethink you.
So. Somewhere along the way, my values became code. For I'm the only one with a moral compass. You know, it would have been a better exercise. Write a top ten list to yourself, where you try to imagine ten reasons why 77 million Americans didn't want to trust you with taking power. And I say that as someone who votes Democratic, as I like to remind my very pure friends, we voted for the same person. You're just why she lost.
Can we please try to remember, especially at this time of year, that most people don't decide their politics. They inherit them. It's about where you grew up in America, what your parents taught you, your life experiences, your religion. Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia was here recently, and I was amazed by the number of people who reached out after the show to say, wow, I kind of like her. Yeah, that's been my line for a while.
Everyone's a monster till you talk to them. On our overtime segment that night, someone asked about the alien spaceship. Maybe you've been reading about it. The three one Atlas comet that's headed to Earth and will arrive on December 19th to wipe out all life as we know it. It's a joke. Don't worry. And when I quoted people in our own Defense Department who had said, well, hold on, what you think might be aliens actually could be fallen angels or demons. Marjorie agreed, saying. Absolutely. She said, I'm a Christian conservative. Angels and demons. That's what we believe. Okay, I think that's nuts.
But you know what? So is is this a girl or a boy? I can't tell by its penis. I'm not going to go through Wokingham's greatest hits now. But you know, the safety ism, the open borders, queers for Palestine, whatever this was. I mean, I could go on. Really. There's a lot of stuff. The Other side has their top ten list, too, and some of it's pretty hard to argue with. And I know, I know, the president of the United States called a woman piggy this week, and you're a better person than me because you hate it more than I do. But I hate it too. Really. As well as a thousand other things about the Trump administration. I never stopped pointing out on this show, but I'm an adult, and in the real world, there's some people you just can't stop talking to, like your spouse or partner after a bad fight. Tempting as that is. Like your dick of a boss, like your family, and like the president of the United States.
This is so childish, so purely emotional. The people who got all butt hurt because I had dinner with them, you know, because he's Hitler. Except he's not so unhelpful and dumb. Trump is the most supportive president Israel and the Jews ever had. You know, every year I used to ask Larry David to do real time, and he'd always say, Bill, I can't. I'm not smart enough about politics to do your show. Yeah, I get that now. Because there is no argument here. There's just the sugar rush that the no contact people get from never coming in second in a I hate Trump the most contest. Really?
That's your strategy to go full high school until the guy with all the power, he can't sit with you at the lunch table, to borrow a phrase familiar to HBO viewers. You are not serious people. I mean, what exactly is the argument that by talking to Trump, I'll elevate him? Oh my God, don't tell me he could become president. Well, I guess, ma'am, Donnie is going to elevate Trump because he went to the white House today. And look who's getting along now. This guy MBS was at the white House this week. Biden thought he could cut him off. But a year later, he found out he couldn't.
There's no perfect way to deal with Trump, but not engaging is for sure nothing. Axios wrote a column in August entitled 11 Ways to Influence Trump, based on many interviews with people who have done that. Number eight get face to face. The trick is getting in the room away from cameras and social media. Trump will say or write horrible things, but rarely in person, one on one where he comes off kinder, more interested, less erratic. Exactly. And there's a bunch of examples of this. Most recently the CEO of Intel who Trump was hating on. But then he met in person, and now he's a great guy. Trump was going to send the National Guard to San Francisco, but somebody talked him out of that. Kim Kardashian, for fuck's sake, convinced him to sign legislation.
Don't you get it? Do you really not get it at this point? Everything with him is done through personal relationships. He's a people guy. Trust me, he's not at home at night poring over the briefing books. This is government by people who are saying, if anything, we need more people like me having dinner with him. You complain he's surrounded by ass kissers, but your strategy is to make sure no one but ass kissers are around him. You are not serious people. Hey. Rachel Maddow went to Dick Cheney's funeral yesterday. We can do this, people.
It's Thanksgiving. Do yourself a favor. Get over yourself and go have it with your family.
